As a professional, how you present yourself to others is critical to your success; and although technical skills are important in doing your job well, it is how well you communicate and get along with others is the real test of your true potential.
Trust, transparency, authenticity and rapport are the four cornerstones of effective communication. Knowing that some people just naturally click with one another - and others, not so much - we can struggle to find common ground which can lead to conflict and a negative work environment.
What we don't always remember, however, is that each of us approach the world differently and have different communication styles. In communication, we tend to speak different "languages." Master communicators understand fully the four cornerstones of effective communication and they adapt their communication "language" to that of the other person. It doesn't mean they would give up their native tongue (who they truly are). It just means they are willing to adapt their approach in order to most effectively engage with others.
Adapting our behavioral and communication styles is one of the most important ways to apply the four cornerstones of effective communication; while also being willing to respect others and put their communication style preference first. Remember, people want to be treated the way THEY want to be treated; not the way you think they should be treated.
What are the communication and behavior styles?
No matter whose approach you study, you will find that your behavior and communication style falls into one of four categories:
The Socializer
The Commander
The Thinker
The Relator
The Socializer is open in their communication style and the focus is on people. They are enthusiastic and creative, they love to talk, love being the center of attention and they are not much for details and organization.
The Commander is closed in their communication style and the focus is on tasks. They are highly verbal, directive, know how to inspire, yet like to be in control and can be pushy.
The Thinker is closed in their communication style and the focus is on tasks. They are detailed oriented, reserved, regimented and prefers to work alone rather than with a group.
The Relator is open in their communication style and the focus is on people. They are friendly and accommodating, democratic and supportive. However, they will give in under pressure and have a tendency to value the approval of others.
Each one of us has a core style as well as a sub-style. As you begin to learn and understand your communication and behavioral style, you will be able to recognize the different communication styles of others and adapt accordingly. This is a great skill to have because you will be seen as someone who can get along with others, work within a team and be seen as someone who can solve challenging problems.
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